Two gay ladies raising a baby

Three years ago Zann Michaels married the love of her life. But unlike other Australians, she was not allowed to marry in her home country. 

She had to travel to Vancouver in Canada to marry her wife, Shan. "I can't understand how marriage equality is not yet a reality in Australia," Zann said. 

"For me, I just want to marry my wife." 

The 29-year-old from Redcliffe in Queensland couldn't be happier. Her wife welcomed their seven-month-old daughter Quin Suzie to the world seven months ago. 

"Quin seems to make everything around her brighter. For a little person, she fills a room with all her smiles and joy. I knew I'd love being a parent, I just didn't realise just how much brighter our lives would be. She's only seven months but she is just so funny and amusing." 

Zann, pictured with Quin, said life had changed for the couple. 

"We wanted her so very much that it is all positive," Zann said. 

"Our daughter was deliberate and we just want to spend our lives seeing her learn and grow and then take on the world." 

Zann said she realised at the age of 19 she was a lesbian. 

"I grew up in a very religious family and being gay just didn't really exist," Zann said. 

"It wasn't until a female friend hit on me that I finally considered feelings outside of heterosexuality." It was then her life changed for the better. 

"When I realised I was a lesbian, it was a moment when everything fell into place for me. My feelings, thoughts, everything within me finally had a name. Far from being freaked out, it was the most honest moment I'd had in my life to date," Zann said. 

Her parents found out she was a lesbian from someone else. 

"My first girlfriend told my sister, who told my cousin, who told another sister, who told my mum," Zann said. 

"When my folks found out I was living in London. It was tough to go through it with them being so far away but it also gave us all space to get over the shock and when we finally saw each other again, things were good." 

Zann said the couple were judged by some people, on occasion. 

"We realised a long time ago that everyone has an opinion about everything and gay, straight, parent, single, whatever - someone has an opinion about what you're doing. The support we've received has always been overwhelmingly positive. If people want to judge me for being gay, I couldn't care less," Zann said. 

She said it was important for people who think they may be gay to be honest with themselves. "Being honest with and about yourself can be scary, but it is also liberating," Zann said. 

"Every coming out will be tough, some more than others, but like they say - it gets better. Educate yourself by reading blogs and linking up with other gay/supportive people. The community is generally very welcoming and supportive and there are so many people willing to help young people. If you don't have anyone to talk to in your life, speak with the good people at Open Doors." 

Zann, pictured with Shan and Quin, said the truth would set people free. 

"Most of all, live your life for you," she said. 

"Although it seems like such a huge thing at first, your sexuality becomes just another bit of all the things that make you. But it's not everything and you have a whole life to fill with people and experiences and things that make you happy."   

You can find out more about Zann, Shan and Quin through Zann's blog Gaybymama - two gay ladies raising a baby at http://www.gaybymama.com

People who want advice can visit http://www.opendoors.net.au

What are your thoughts? Log onto http://www.connectpink.com.au to have your say.

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